I want to talk about band......
Band has been apart of me since the 6th grade and it’s something I can count on when I need some fun. Just recently things have started to change. It’s starting to feel like work…to much work and to be honest it is starting to stress me out just a little. I have talked to a few people that I know in band about how they feel and see if it was just me…..I still don’t know….I guess it could be me. But one thing I know is that I am not a quitter. The only thing I ever quit in my life was swimming. I had to choose between marching band or the swim team. The reason for that is I was way to overloaded with those 2 things and school work. I cried and fought with my diction for a month and finally made my decision. I chose band over swim. I left with only 2seconds away from making it to state…but at the same time I felt a loud lift from my shoulders. Now the time has come again to make yet another decision. I think is going to be my last year in the cowboy marching band. I hate saying that because it’s nice feeling when someone finds out that you are apart of that and tell you that’s awesome. But sometimes you just have to let go. Sometimes I don’t want to go to band because I know have homework and sit there thinking I shouldn’t be here I should be doing something else and sometimes I feel like I just want out right now but I know that I have to finish this semester out and be done with it. Is it a bad thing to think that? Just the thought of not being in band is a weird thing to think out about.
Ok, on a lighter note my friend Donnie and I are going to the blue man group in November! We have floor seats…YAY!
p.s. sorry for the lame update and I will try and make the next one a little happier!
2 comments:
Ya gotta do what you gotta do. By the time next fall...a year from now rolls around, you'll know. Don't stress.
Yeah, I know what you mean and I can say with some conviction that it is not just "you." I found myself faced with the same decision after my freshman year at Baylor. My situation was a little different, so I can't tell you what to do. I would encourage you to go with you gut. I would search deep. All I can say is that I always noticed a little sparkle in your eye and the excitement when you talked about Cowboy Band... You would bite your lip and quickly go into the whole pony trot thing you do with you arms and feet... The dangerous part about quitting something like band is the lack of involvement that follows. I would encourage you not to completely isolate yourself. When I quit, I lost access to a bunch of existing and potential friends. It was lonely for a while. When life gets tough and the stress and storms come, the easy thing to do is get depressed and seek isolation. I think that is the worst thing possible... just make sure you stay connected with the university in some way. I chose the sailing team, ultimately... it made a difference.
I can see how you have been torn on the subject. You have invested allot of years developing your talent in band... You would hate to throw that away. But, mom is right, you gotta do what you gotta do. I get a sense that you regret your decision to quit swimming... If so, you are probably having a tough time making a decision because of the fear of making a bad one [possibly again].
Here is the truth... This is something that took me a long time to learn. Sometimes, we seek and seek and pray and pray for God to reveal the answer of what we should do or not do in the context of a big decision. The thing is, now this may shock you, in some cases, I don't think God really cares what you do. He just wants you to make a decision and trust him that if it is the wrong one that HE will fix it. This is sovereignty of GOD! God is sovereign... if you make a bad decision, he can and will fix it! Who can be against you? All that is required of you is FAITH. Step out, take a chance... nobody said it would be easy... but you know that. You KNOW that because you have beat the odds... proved everyone wrong... you are living your dream.
Hang in there and TRUST God's sovereignty. And like the Fray said in that one song, "Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same..." If it were easy, Brendo, everyone would do it. You are extraordinary. I love you!
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